Saturday, August 22, 2009

Dealing with it

Well less than a week to go before we get the gas turned back on. Honestly, I am getting kind of used to the cold showers and lack of stove. I love me some BBQ and having to have it every single night has not gotten old. And having to heat water to do the dished on the BBQ? It just means I actually do the dished every night, instead of letting them pile up. I can do this.

So my weight loss is stalled. I am not gaining, which is great. But I am not losing either. I think I am at an optimal fill level. But I need to start working with it, not against it. Eating crap food and candy bars is not going to help my cause. I think I may need a shock collar to keep myself out of the candy aisle. Though my vision of that goes something like this- chew, chew, OUCH, chew,chew, OUCH, chew, chew, HOLY SHIT OUCH, chew,chew. I am afraid if would not even help. Heck I get so full sometimes that my whole chest burns and all I can think about is how I can get another bite in there. It is sick. Why can't I have an excessive exercise habit, or shopping addiction, or heroin? I really might take a heroin addiction over food because then I would at least be thin.

I am also wondering if maybe I am a bit dehydrated. I have been waking up every day with the feeling of a hangover. Slight headache and just a general feeling of blah. I am not a fan. So I need to try and put forth some effort into making sure in to getting enough fluids. Then if I am still feeling like ass I can start examining all of the reasons why I must be dying. Because I am a hypochondriac like that. Don't hate.

And the water is so not going down. Damn this band is a fickle bitch.

And so I am going to add on to this to keep myself out of the kitchen. I am stuffed full and wanna barf. As if I ate a whole pizza and not just 1/8c of Spaghetti-os and 3/4 slice of bread. Yeah I know it is not healthy but it's poor. And right now poor trumps healthy. I had to do one of the biggest WLS no-nos like 20 minutes ago. I took a Motrin 800. Now for those of you without WLS Motrin is a huge no-no for the chemical shit storm it causes in your stomach. Since your stomach is smaller you have a much greater chance of developing an ulcer. But for me at this point in my life the chance of an ulcer is no where near outweighed by the throbbing migraine that is pulsating though my skull. Or is that the other way around? At any rate the headache is bad enough for me to take the Motrin. And risk bleeding ulcers. Maybe I would change my tune if I actually had an ulcer but since I have not had the displeasure of one of those puppies I will just chance it. Plus took it with a bunch of milk. And then followed that up with Spaghetti-os. As if anything bad happens to people who eat Chef Boyardee.

No comments: